I’ve been digging deep into the mindset of narcissists. I want to humanize them in order to help you to understand them. Ultimately, the goal is to teach how to be less traumatized by their actions. Here is a personal account that Vermeer, a friend of VIPStepmom put together about their […]
Q: Last night my fiance revealed some things to me that I was not aware of. Prior to our relationship, we were friends I knew that he had suffered from depression after the birth of his daughter because she was taking away at 3 months and he did not see her again until she was […]
My clients Denver and Ayshia are a Mom+Stepmom combo that are experiencing a common dilemma. It’s common for children and custodial parents to suffer separation anxiety when the child spends time with their noncustodial parent. This often leads to intrusive phone calls which interrupt bonding time with the child’s other family. During this session, the […]
Q: I’ve had HCBM blocked for 5 years. Since the kids are with us for the summer, DH and I decided to allow her to contact me. That lasted for 2 days!!! “Thanks for taking great care of my kids.” (2 minutes later) “You will never be able to attend a birthday, graduation or wedding […]
Have you ever felt that your man was showing WAY too much grace to his unrelenting coparent? Is he weak? Does he still want her? Is he just stupid? Well, our fellow VIP, Kiya is dealing with this right now. To get the full backstory, click HERE. I recorded a quick video response for her […]
https://youtu.be/8_KWHCDPwD4 Stepmom! Hey girl hey! Here’s a bit of advice that I almost learned TOO LATE! I know it sucks to see your partner deal with conflict from his coparent. As his Wonder Woman, it is natural to want to swoop in and save the day. 🛑Stop🛑 I want you to switch gears and work […]
I got special permission to share this session with you. I sat down with a woman with a HCBD. Here’s a bit of insight, the HCBD’s new partner (and his family) believe he the victim and they are unknowingly furthering his mission to alienate and inflict pain on his ex. Sound familiar? I felt this […]
Here are YOUR rules for stepmommin’! Print them, make them your screensaver! Commit them to memory. Everything I share is with the intention that your journey will be a beautiful one. I find that so many of us are consumed by the antics of others because we are imbalanced. Have you ever seen someone blow […]
I recently chatted with my friend Brian Barnett. He is not only an expert on Borderline Personality Disorder, he’s actually rid himself of the terrible disorder that plagues 4% of Americans. This podcast takes an in-depth look at BPD and the people that it affects. Brian is proof that there is hope beyond borderline. FROM […]
Mashonda, ex-wife of music producer Swizz Beats discusses healing from their messy divorce, forgiving Alicia Keys and putting her son first. In her new book, Blend, she offers tips for mothers that need healing from breakup and divorce. She also details her unique childhood experience in her own blended family. https://youtu.be/kl9RtLz7hns Sign up for a […]
There is no such rule that you must accept abuse or disrespect because you now occupy a new role! If you are feeling the heat from your partner’s ex or your stepkids then check out this video! While you may never get them to love you, you can take back your personal peace by unapologetically […]
I sat down with Skyra Thomas, founder of FliptheZip.com, a community that connects people looking to relocate. We discussed a touchy topic that many stepfamilies will face at some point. Skyra has a positive long distance co-parenting relationship with her son’s father and she grew up traveling between both her parent’s households in different cities. […]
kPaul Elam is quite colorful but he is VERY experienced on personality disordered women. If you are not easily offended, you’ll find some helpful nuggets in his chat about ‘Crazy Bitches”. https://youtu.be/iVznYqY8EEg Sign up for a VIPStepmom Membership TODAY! Check out our Facebook Reviews Follow us on the Gram! Listen to the Podcast If […]
How to EXPOSE the narcissist in Court and/or to Psychologist! This video teaches how to prove that a coparent is a narcissist. Visit www.micheleleenieves.com https://youtu.be/N-LFevkioV4 Sign up for a VIPStepmom Membership TODAY! Check out our Facebook Reviews Follow us on the Gram! Listen to the Podcast If you are not yet a member, click HERE […]
Living alongside a narcissist is hard work. Co-parenting with a narcissistic is tough. This type of mother seeks sympathy from any audience by positioning herself as the self-sacrificial patron saint of motherhood. While it’s expected that a mom would do anything for her family, this one has an innate need to be admired and acknowledged. […]
This week I am chatting with the founder of Erasing Family, Ginger Gentile. According to www.Erasingfamily.org, in the US alone, over 22 MILLION PARENTS are being erased from their children’s lives after divorce and separation. Ginger offers tips on how to cope as an erased family member and how to handle your child when they […]
In this episode of I Know I’m Crazy with Naja Hall, I chat with Psychotherapist and abuse survivor, Anita Bentata. She hails from Australia and she shares her own experiences with abuse and how she has turned her life experiences into a life-changing platform. ABOUT OUR GUEST ANITA BENTATA: Anita Bentata transforms the uncomfortable into living […]
Listen on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher or Google Play In this episode of I Know I’m Crazy with Naja Hall, I chat with Jennifer Arnise. Our conversation was uncomfortably too real at times because we are discussing a tough topic, Toxic Mothers! Jen gives personal and professional insights on how to deal with a toxic mom. […]
Great news Fam! Our founder, Naja Hall landed her very 1st magazine cover with Stepmom Magazine! Check out her article HERE. I’ve been reading Stepmom Magazine since before I officially became a Stepmom, so it’s definitely a full-circle moment to be featured by the women whom I go to for help. This is a really, […]
Listen on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher or Google Play In this episode of I Know I’m Crazy with Naja Hall, I chat with Addiction Treatment Specialist, Chris Wilkins. I was instantly drawn to his work because many of us are consumed by conflict and he is the perfect person to teach us about letting go […]
I couldn’t wait until the premiere date next week to share something on the *first season of I Know I’m Crazy! The IKIC podcast line up is AMAZING!!! This is not an official podcast for IKIC but it gives you an up close and personal view of me! If you scroll down, there’s also video […]
Hi Naja! I’ve followed you for a while now and really appreciate the advice you provide. I’m looking for a little advice for my situation. What do you suggest stepmoms do when the biomom is hot and cold? She wants to be “friends” one minute and then blocks you the next! At this point […]
Ultimately you were never loved you were used, abused and manipulated. You loved a facade that didn’t exist, you became addicted … you should run away before it’s too late.
How do we forgive the unforgivable? How do we renew a relationship that has been broken beyond repair? You may have heard that forgiveness is not for the offender, but for the offended, and to some degree this is true. It is certainly good for both, but we need to understand that accountability and acceptance […]
My Client has watched helplessly as her 10-year old custodial stepdaughter has transformed from loving to tough-to-love in less than a year. Stepdaughter returns from weekend visits with her biological mother acting unruly and disrespectful. The biological mother has just re-entered the child’s life after an ‘illness’ and I suspect this is the root cause […]
I get A LOT of inspiration from the Blended & Black Facebook group. Yesterday someone posted this picture on the group’s wall. We see the child surrounded and supported by ALL of her parents. These folk seem to have gotten it right. I know there are many people that have a strong desire for this […]
Alma’s speech became stilted, and her eyes brimmed with tears as she shared the moment she knew her marriage was over. It was not a matter of infidelity, immorality, or a lack of love that ended her marriage of three years. In fact, she and her husband deeply loved each other—but his manic episodes had […]
LISTEN NOW: Soundcloud or Youtube What happens when you find out your Husband is cheating? Well this week’s guest, Sassi, took it upon herself to seek out the mistress, post her picture and phone number on Craigslist! This week’s podcast was informative, funny, heartbreaking and then funny again! This week’s guest, Blended and Black member, Sassi […]
Today I talked with Blended and Black member, Antoinette. Together she and her Husband have blended clan of 8 children! Yup 8 kids! Her Husband has 4 from a previous marriage. Antoinette has 3. And together they have 1. Antoinette shares anecdotes about how to support a Spouse that share’s kids with a high-conflict ex. […]
Are you dealing with disrespectful stepkids? Why would they be disrespectful? Like it or not, phrases like, “You’re not my Mom!” may be thrown around in times of disobedience and defiance. As a pruned at this very moment to defy my Husband and I every chance they get. They are being severely alienated and have […]
HEAR ME OUT BEFORE I GET AN #EyeRoll! Today, let’s TRY a little tenderness! If you’re in a high conflict co-parenting situation, the last thing you may want to do is send niceties to the ONE person who’s mission is to make your life a living hell. I want to nudge you to try something […]
By Naja Hall I normally rest up on Saturday mornings, but this tea is far too juicy not to share! I came across this post in my Facebook news feed and I am not sure what’s more interesting, the scorned wife’s note or the comments section! I was thoroughly entertained by both, and from the […]
Back in the good old days when all we had were pagers — scratch that, let’s go even further. Back in the good old days when all we had were answering machines and a mailbox, breaking up was much easier to do. All you had to do was stop sending mail and calling each other. […]
In a blog post that soon went viral, Candice Curry, 39, wrote ‘you were supposed to be hideous, remember? But you weren’t, you were stunningly beautiful’ Happy family: Candice Curry, left, and her daughter Stiles with stepmum Ashley Parish Many mothers dread the idea of another woman raising their child, but one has decided to […]
After reading the list, don’t get discouraged when you notice that some of your own behaviors have been alienating your ex-spouse. This is normal in even the best of parents. Instead, let the list help sensitize you to how you are behaving and what you are saying to your children. Here are common mistakes: To […]
You may think, at first pass, that co-parenting with your child’s stepmother is unreasonable. If you think about it, we get to know our children’s teachers, doctors, daycare providers, their friend’s and their parents, and anyone else involved with our children. Why wouldn’t you want to get to know the other mother in your child’s […]
Too often women are saddled down with labels. We are constantly forced into a box of good, bad, worthy, unworthy and more. Women are seen as a second-class citizens in society and when it comes to parenting, there is no difference. We often hear men speak on their bitter baby mommas. She doesn’t want […]
Dear Ask Dad, As a man I have never written in to one of these columns, but I don’t know what to do. My daughter is 15 years old and she is a fantastic young lady. She is an honor student, captain of her basketball team and she volunteers as well. My issue is with […]
THE GOOD WIFE Who’s helping You, when his Ex is a Borderline? Whether it’s your husband or lover who has gotten involved with a borderline disordered female, you’re in for some harrowing times. This issue becomes a monumentally stressful exercise for both of you–but sadly, you’ll generally end up feeling the brunt of it, not […]
A warning for Stepmoms (and biomoms). Yes Stepmoms, you read that right. The BioMonster (high conflict bio mom) you’re dealing with was created with your help – the Stepmom who chose a life most would run away from. For those of you who haven’t heard of the term “BioMonster,” I’ll define it like this: a […]
For the 1st episode of B&B TV, I’ve partnered with CelebrityXO to bring you a Pop Culture edition of Blended and Black TV! I’m so excited about this collaboration because I get to mesh my favorite topic, Blended Families with one of my other favorite things to chat about: TEA! This week we’re discussing Megan Markle’s […]
Most mothers reflect fondly upon the day their children were born as one that tested her strength, her faith, her pain tolerance and her undying love for a child she’d never met. The birth bond is so strong that every mother could probably recount everything leading up to the moment her child was born. When […]
As second wives, it’s not uncommon to feel the brunt of the grief from the breakdown of your Husband’s first family. The children may still be unable to accept their parents’ separation, the ex-wife may still be full of resent and the father may have a lot of guilt because he is now displaced from […]
There is an inherent toxicity that occurs in the Stepmother/Biological mother dynamic. Just like cats and dogs are natural-born enemies, it is almost expected that a SM and BM will have a relationship built on contempt and competition. The fact of the matter is, when women work together for the betterment of the children that […]
Blended and Black founder, Naja Hall spoke with AskSharifah on Sharifah Hardie’s long-running LA talk radio show. The ladies had a full 1 hour session on-air and it was full of so many sistafriend moments. They spoke about Naja’s experiences as a Family Life Coach and some best practices in dealing with high-conflict personalities, mental illness, […]
When we are falling in love, we tend to overlook some key factors that will ultimately determine the success or failure of our relationship. In the beginning of a relationship, we are often blinded by lust, fantasy and hope. The definition stage of a relationship usually lasts from 6 months to a year. During this […]
In our community, I notice that a lot of us are overly emotional but we lack the depth to properly express our feelings. People are increasingly seeming more angry and confused. There are so many walking around with undiagnosed mental illnesses and the majority of our issues began taking root during our childhoods. Our […]
Sis, May I have a word with you for a second? There are far too many good men who are fighting to be involved in the life of a child they created only to be constantly turned away by a bio-mom. There is also a statistic of women who are fighting to have their child’s […]
What if I told you that all Babymamas are not evil ? While she may be perceived as bitter, angry or spiteful, she really doesn’t mean to be. Now hear me out! I grew up with a Southern Granny and she had a favorite saying, “pay that no mind”? My Grandmother was trying to communicate […]
I recently read an article written by a woman that admittedly has Daddy issues. She was very open about her struggles with maintaining healthy relationships because of her deeply embedded fear of abandonment. Her lack of trust for her father had resonated throughout many of her interpersonal relationships. Like many people raised by a Single […]
Dear Naja, My husband asked me to post this because he’s at a loss for what to do. He has 50/50 joint physical and legal custody of the kids. In addition, in the court order he requested it be written in that we have two uninterrupted weeks during the summer with the kids because BM […]